Female Prisoners Protest Against Hirunika’s Arrest After Fears She Will Win Miss Jail Bird 2016

HPSauceA number of female prisoners are staging a protest in the state prison after hearing the news that President of Thug Life – Sri Lanka and MP Hirunika Premadchandra will be eligible to participate in Miss Jail Bird 2016 after being taken into custody for trying to resolve a family matter with an abduction.

Miss Premachandra, who descends from a line of apparent thugs, was arrested this morning after the Attorney General and Police, who finally managed to figure out what their respective jobs were, took relevant action. The MP has said that she is innocent and is going to plead not guilty to all charges apart from that of looking good.

One female prisoner, who was the odds one favourite to take the Miss Jail Bird crown prior to Hirunika’s entry said, “She should not be allowed to participate and it is unfair on all the other contestants. Even her crime is actually just a misdemeanour. As an MP this country as a long history of politicians involved in abductions and getting away with it, but just because she did it in a Defender she has been implicated. Of course, she lied about her crime which is something she should not have done and we as fellow criminals are disappointed in her behaviour.” I have worked very hard in the competition so far and with her good looks, makeup and unblemished teeth, I fear she will win unanimously.”

“I have worked very hard in the competition so far and with her good looks, makeup and unblemished teeth, I fear she will win unanimously,”  she added.

Her lawyer said he would file for her to move into the hospital wing after suffering serious injuries from a tickling episode during one of recent press briefings after her lawyer was seen furiously tickling her elbow in a bid to get her to not implicate herself further.

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