Government Debt Crisis So Bad That It Is Going To Sell Camphor Balls At Traffic Light Stops

Following a recent Forbes article which suggested that the Government did not know how much debt it actually owed, the authorities have decided to resort to selling camphor balls and joss sticks at traffic lights in order to raise the unknown quantity of funds.

A statement issued by the Ministry of Finance addressing the concerns raised by the article said, “ Despite the claims by Forbes, we have a very good idea of how much debt we owe. It currently stands between ‘Woah, that’s a lot we owe’ and ‘How the bloody hell are we gonna pay this?’. We believe that this is an amount that we can raise but it will take a little effort and lots of praying. We are particularly appealing to Chinese deities at this juncture.”

“However as a Plan B, we have decided to raise funds by selling camphor balls and joss sticks over the next few months. Considering the worsening traffic situation across the country there are several opportunities to hassle drivers to buy these goods and not only ward off insects and make their abodes smell nicer but also help contribute toward government coffers. Desperate times and desperate ministers call for desperate government ministers,” the statement added.

The Government was initially planning on raising funds through issuing bonds, but they realised that Perpetual Treasuries are likely to make more money than the Government.