Significant Reduction In Road Rage and Accidents Expected As Private Bus Drivers Threaten To Strike

The Minister of Highways has indicated that the number of road accidents, which normally sees a rise in December, is expected to fall this month as a result of the proposed threat of strike action by the Private Bus Drivers Association.

Speaking at a press conference, a spokesman for the association said, “The new government budget proposals will have a significant impact on our business, but it literally won’t stop us as we will continue to weave through traffic and put people’s lives in danger, while dropping some of them off along the way. To compensate for the increase in emission charges, we will have to now drive much faster so we cab cover our routes more times than we used to. But we still stop at some halts for 10 minutes because we always have, even if there is no one at the bus stop.”

At the same time, the Minister of Highways said, “This is yet another achievement of Yahapaalanaya. As a result of this strike which we engineered, we have managed to reduce the number of injuries and fatalities that occur on the road, reduce traffic and the only small side effect is that a few people won’t be able to get to work. We encourage those people to go out and buy a car which is now even more expensive.”

According to statistics issued by the Department of Highways, the number of ministers who have taken public transport this year is equivalent to the number of ministers who own cars that powered by helium.