‘At Least We Are Better Than Previous Lot’ Say Govt Ministers After Getting Caught Doing Dodgy Stuff

A number of Government Ministers have requested that the public refrain from holding them to a higher standard of ethical and moral conduct despite having campaigned on good governance and from believing anything that they say, indicating that they should only be measured in relationship to the previous government.

A spokesperson for the Government said in a press conference today, “All you need to do is compare us with the previous regime. We didn’t abduct journalists but we will have a go at them if we don’t like what they report and ask them to register with us so we can monitor them. We have far fewer relatives than the former first family so obviously, there is going to be less nepotism, but we will still have to make some questionable appointments. But at least, it is not all from the immediate family.”

“Take Mr Kiriella’s recent behaviour. The past regime wrote letters much more frequently to get favours done, but the Minister has only written two. So you see this is not about principles. It is about the frequency in which we break these principles compared to the former government. That is how we should be measured. Even Hirunika abducted only one person and that was also in a Defender, not a white van.” he added.

A former Government spokesperson said, “They can try to compare themselves to us but we were much better than them on all fronts, especially the dodgy stuff. They will never be able to match us.”