NewsCurry Breaking news and serving it up in pieces
TL;DR – It’s really not that long
This is going to be messy, so take a seat and pull out a box of tissues. We’re about to show you show you some porn.
But before that our corporate astrologer said we’ve got to pull the plug on News Curry. Having accepted the buyout offer from Amazon we will use the funds to open an account in Seychelles and have our own entry in the Panama Papers. One day we may plug back in only to be told there is a power cut.
For the moment we’re freeing up your time to do more productive things like writing a 5000 word Facebook rant about how the fries you ordered were not plated in height order, following real news outlets, believing our politicians or queuing up for petrol despite having a full tank.
News Curry was meant to poke fun at the absurdity of life in Sri Lanka, particularly news and politics and call out the manure. However, some people just don’t get satire and nothing was ever meant to be personal. Unless you’re Ravi Karunanayake – then we meant every word of it.
We are extremely grateful to everyone who ever read, liked, shared, commented on, hash-tagged, tweeted, retweeted, messaged, contributed, wrote about, advertised with, discussed, kept hush about, and, on the very rare occasion, laughed at a News Curry story. We appreciate the time and effort taken to indulge us.
A muchos gracias also to everyone who also bought t-shirts (still available here), and the two proposals of marriage.
For interest in reviving News Curry via Series B funding, considerations of a merger, joint venture or acquisition, or digital marketing services including creative conceptualisation email our agent at newscurrysl@gmail.com.
We also accept sexual advances and bribes.
Thank you
News Curry
For any questions relating to the veracity of any of the articles written by News Curry, email bandula.gunawardena@jointopposition.lk
