NewsCurry Breaking news and serving it up in pieces
MP and non-holder of a Law Degree Hirunika Premachadra, was today appointed as Head Of Thug Life – Sri Lanka, after the previous top dog and all round paraya, Mervyn Silva, was unceremoniously sacked for reported dwindling abduction numbers during the last year.
Hirunika, whose captured people’s hearts, minds and most of all the sympathy vote, said that she was honoured to have been appointed to the role. Speaking to the media while her lawyer tickled her she said, “I was shocked to discover that under Yahapaalanaya abductions had severely diminished and that a number of thugs and goons were out of work. I took it upon myself to ensure that these righteous citizens who work hard to beat people up have a chance to put their skills to use. I decided to carry out on one abduction and while an overall success, there are some areas we need to work on including not getting caught.”
“Thug Life is not just a motto, it’s a way of life and I will do my best to continue my family’s heritage of using threats and physical force to get what I want and protect my position as an MP for which I am completely unsuitable.” she added.
We tried to reach her lawyer for further comment but was informed that he was not available and was out tickling other clients.
