Two Parliamentarians Given One Week Suspension From Their Jobs Of Not Doing Much

With Sri Lankan Parliamentarians resorting to fisticuffs in order get a story about local politics in the global media, two members of parliament have been suspended from their jobs of speaking at press conferences and err  that’s it, for a period of one week which will not result in much of a difference from their average work day.

One of the suspended ministers said, “I have never put any effort to  being a Parliamentarian like I did a few days ago when the fracas broke out. Not even campaigning and feigning work was as tiring as trying to figure out which person I should lunge at during the fight. It took a mammoth effort to ensure I was effective in my role of lashing out indiscriminately in all directions in the attempt to catch someone. It seems to have paid off I’ve now been given one weeks leave to do nothing which is akin to what I do anyway.”

Speaker of Parliament, Karu Jayasuriya said, “The behaviour of politicians of both sides of the house was appalling and I’m dishing out the harshest punishment afforded – one week’s paid leave for the ministers to conduct their private business. This smear on their record will not only be forgotten by everyone within a few days it will also send a message to other MPs that they too can be eligible for a weeks leave if they behave inappropriately.”

Meanwhile, Ranjan Ramanayake said, “Had I been there this would have been over in one shot and ended up like a 5 minute shoving match with little ground gained by anyone.”