Debris from Sri Lankan Airlines Financial Wreckage yet to Wash Up

SLACommercial Aviation’s biggest mystery – how the former President’s Brother in Law came to be the Chairman of the national carrier despite no relevant experience apart from travelling economy class a few times – is no closer to being solved after the he went missing on January 9th without a trace.

The Federal Aviation Authority released a statement after the second biggest mystery looked like it may be uncovered after wreckage from MH 370 was found in an island off the coast of Madagascar over the weekend, leading to the possibility that the missing millions from Sri Lankan Airlines may also resurface.

However the authorities are still baffled by Mr Wickramasinghe’s appointment and tenure at Sri Lankan airlines and his subsequent disappearance from the spotlight. “We have sent several teams of air stewardesses to try locate him but are no closer to discovering his whereabouts. While in the helm of the airline, he had a tremendous record of filling seats with government officials and relatives who agreed to maybe not pay and we want to use his skills to run down a few other airlines which are past their expiry date. We will also have to end his membership of the Fly Smiles Club if he does not claim them in the next week. We believe his Mile High Club membership also expired after his wife found out.”

Meanwhile Mihin Air’s iMihinnnovative approach to reducing costs by inviting passengers to pilot the plane on their journey and combining it with their new logo ‘Yours to Fly’, has caused an uproar with the pilot’s union who are threatening to go on strike unless it is changed to ‘Our to Fly – You just sit and buckle up’

 

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