Newscurry’s Christmas Gift Guide: Cardinal Approved Trees, Gifts For Your Local MP, The Unmarried And More

It’s Christmas week – you’ve spent your salary and bonus on alcohol, Santa isn’t real but the wrath of friends for whom you haven’t bought presents is very real.

NewsCurry is here to help you with our expertly curated Christmas Gift Guide with something for everyone. Except G.L. Peiris who can never be pleased.

1. Thinking of buying a gift for your local MP? We’ve got a huge selection of toys for kids under 5 that will keep him or her occupied for hours on end. http://takas.lk/toys-kids-baby/toys.html

 2. Our Christmas Tree comes pre-approved by the Cardinal so there is no way anyone will stop you from putting it up. http://takas.lk/more/christmas-decorations.html

 

The best part – it doesn’t cost Rs 12 million and you don’t need private donors.

3. We’re still the number 1 for TVs with more inches than John Amaratunga will know what to do with and amazing bargains http://takas.lk/offers/televisions.html

 

4. In your thirties and unmarried and Lankan? We’ve got pressure cookers that exert more force than those aunts who keep telling you to put a ring on it and have children And makes tastier meals.

http://takas.lk/home-garden/kitchen-appliance.html

5. Are you one of the Sri Lankans who contributed to the country topping the list for search term ‘sex’ on Google? Protect yourself from viruses on these sites and wear a condom while using the internet

http://takas.lk/beauty-health/personal-care/sexual-wellness.html

6. If your Astrologer picked the wrong date for the election, then next time use Astrology software instead. 

http://takas.lk/electronics-computers/softwares/astrology-software.html

7. For that special IGP who wants to conduct a press conference and at the same time avoid arresting people that he should be – we’ve got some of the best phones with call waiting facilities and text to speech apps so he can multitask and arrest people!

http://takas.lk/offers/phones/apple-iphone.html

8. If you want to hit someone who owns a Selfie Stick, why not buy a Selfie Stick so you can picture yourself while doing it?

http://takas.lk/electronics-computers/mobile-accessories-sri-lanka-electronics/selfie-sticks.html

9. Our heavy duty earplugs will protect your ears from hearing any more tall tales from this Government and help you sleep better

http://takas.lk/electronics-computers/earphones-headphones.html

10. Treat yourself this Xmas to the inner model in you, because inner beauty never led to a truly happy ending

http://takas.lk/beauty-health.html?cat=219

BONUS: 

If you’ve managed to make a lot of money from a Bond Scam then check out our range of furniture to purchase for your new home

http://takas.lk/home-garden.html?cat=341

And don’t forget that Red Scarves are not just for Christmas – you can always wear them year round if you crave power and nepotism runs in your family 

This guide has been possible with Takas.lk (but they really don’t know anything about this) who have more products than can be stored at Mattala Airport and delivery so quick that we are in line to replace Lasith M in the ODI squad.  

Our negotiators are better than Ravi so we’ve got some amazing offers and great instalment plans so that you can keep paying for purchases right up to next Christmas.