‘I Worked Hard To Get Elected So I Don’t Need To Work Anymore’ Say MPs

A recent study conducted by reading news headlines has revealed that productivity levels of a number of politicians have significantly dropped since the election campaign, despite getting the jobs that they actually campaigned for and promised to work hard in.

In addition to news headlines, the study analysed sleep patterns, time spent on the road, number of meetings attended and use of the term “I promise to work hard for you”. Dubbed the “I Got The Job” work pattern, it suggests that the most productive period of a politician’s life will be when he is campaigning to secure votes and not when he is actually in office working on behalf of the people.

One minister said “You know how many nights I didn’t sleep in August, running around try to get people to give me a job that I don’t need to work in? Not like a job interview where you have to fool about 3 people, campaigning involved fooling hundreds of thousands of people. Now I got the job what for the work? I’ll just make media appearances to keep the people believing I actually work hard.”

In order to counter the criticism, MPs are planning to make even more media appearances.