SLC Say Rambukwella Had Successful Series; No Airplane Doors Opened During Flights

Despite the disappointing series against England, Sri Lanka Cricket citied the performance of Ramitha Rambukwella as being one of the only positive highlights, following analysis of his statistics which revealed that he managed to avoid opening doors on any of the flights during the series which concluded last week.

The feat, which helped salvaged some pride in what was otherwise an abysmal performance by the Lankans, was achieved despite the intense cabin pressure at the time. Speaking on arrival back to Sri Lanka, a spokesman for BCCSL said, “We are extremely satisfied with this result. We gave him extra training in order to correct his action and avoiding swinging his arm in the direction of airplane doors. We also positioned him in the mid-section of the cabin so he was as far away as possible from accessing exit points.”

“These measures all seem to have paid off and we are glad that this time, there were no side effects from the on-board drinks break that he enjoyed. Even if he is not selected for the final eleven in any future matches, at least we will include him on future flights as long as there are seats available after the rest of the Board members and their wives have taken up their priority allocation.”

Sri Lankan Airlines said “We have taken extra security measures and have installed a safety feature which only allows players with the ability to make a valuable contribution to the team to access the doors. So we are confident that Mr Rabukwella will not be able to access them for a while.”